“Born in the roughest part of the artsiest neighborhood of Vancouver, Washington (the red-headed step child of Portland, Oregon). Joey had to develop a quick wit and a stylish wardrobe to avoid the wrath of Portlandia hipsters. Worshiped by few, admired by many, talked about by most. Joey realized at at a young age that he might in fact be Elvis’ reincarnated twin brother, and as such grew his sideburns in honor of the King.”